Amritsar, a quick note for now

I'm in an Internet cafe about 100 yards from the Golden Temple and about 10 feet away from Jallianwala Bagh. I came in to check my email and the scores of the NBA playoffs. What I find instead is an operating system on the computers that I didn't recognize at first. It looked like Windows XP, but there was a few things different. I thoght maybe it was in fact Windows 95, and I was going to declare this cafe a historical monument. (Not to mention the terible keyboards that are causing so many typos that I think I'll just leave tem in there.) But yeah, turns out it's not XP but Windows ME!!!! ME?? Who do you know who even used ME?? Amazing.

 

Anyway, recap and other news later.

My doctor says and my garage mechanic agrees ...

There's a Simpsons episode where Homer, Bart and Lisa go grocery shopping. Bart and Lisa keep bringing junk food to add to the cart with increasingly ridiculous excuses. Homer, instead of opposing these purchases, joins them. So when Bart says, "I need this candy for school. Candy class.", Homer replies with, "Well, OK, but get five bags in case we eat four on the way home." Eventually Bart and Lisa just stop giving excuses and just keep adding junk food to the cart. At this point Homer picks up a six-pack of beer and starts creating his own excuse, "My doctor says and my garage mechanic agrees ..." when Bart just waves the six-pack through.

My situation at work is a lot similar. It's one thing when I want to leave early or come late to work and I have to explain this to my manager with some flimsy excuse. But my manager himself never shows up on time, takes plenty of days off and tries to justify to us why he's being tardy and lazy. And I have to say, "Yeah, it's OK, you can take time off." Amazing. Reminds me of George Costanza and Kruger at Kruger Industrial smoothing "(We don't care and it shows"), where George ends up being the more responsible one! Geez!

To deposit a cheque

My ghetto company doesn't believe in electronic deposit of salaries, so we get cheques handed to us by hand. We were told, "Don't discuss your salaries with anyone else." with my idiot manager even adding an unnecessary, "Your actual salary doesn't always have a relation to your position." I'm praying that that means he's making less than us. *Please Please Please*

Anyway, that means that for the first time in forever, I have to actually go deposit a salary cheque in an ATM. The closest ATM is about a mile and a half away and I wasn't looking forward to walking all that distance in the heat. I tried to get a cycle-rickshaw to take me there but while bargaining I realized that apparently I am too cheap to pay a man an extra Rs. 5 (on my way to deposit a cheque about 10,000 times that amount) to carry me for that distance. It turned out for the best anyway - as I was walking, I found the best mangoes I've seen this season so far. Pictures of me with mango juice all over face coming up in the next post. (Seriously, I can't put in words how excited I am about getting my hands on these mangoes! But more on those later.)

As I was standing there in the bus stop waiting for another rickshaw or bus to take me to the ATM, a car pulled over to ask me for directions. Now being as I'm new to the city, I figured I wouldn't be able to help that person much but I knew exactly where he needed to go and told him how to get there. Then I asked him if he could take me there since I needed to go there as well. He said, "Sure, hop in." As we were chatting, he mentioned he drove all the way in from Punjab and had to go to a meeting in Sector 10. I told him I was new to the city as well and he asked me where I came from. Hyderabad, I said. "Oh, I'm Telugu too!" he replied. Wonderful! So we chatted a bit more. He asked me about restaurant recommendations and in particular S. Indian restaurtants, and again, I felt comfortable giving him directions. Eventually we reached our destination(s) and said our goodbyes. It was a nice surprise running into a Telugu guy.

I deposited the check at the ATM, their check deposit machine broke down and I ended up "depositing" my cheque into a weird looking slot. I hope I'll be seeing that money again. On the way back I realized that my chances of getting a cycle rickshaw were even worse, just looking around. So I resigned myself to walking back. Unless, I could get a ride from a motorcyclist. So I stuck my thumb out, not really expecting anyone to respond. But man! I guess it was my lucky day. The very first driver who saw me, stopped, and I got on. He explained that he wasn't going where I was, so I told him to drop me off where our routes split. But as we got talking and he realized that I live in the same neighbourhood as him, he decided to go a little out of the way to drop me off right at my office!

Nice people. And I even took the food out of a poor rickshaw driver, so bonus points for me.

Your city is so old.

How old is your city?

Your city is so old -

1. They actually have rickshaws here! It's a nice throwback. My mom and some of my friends from Hyderabad are really tickled by the fact that we have cycle-rickshaws here because we just don't see them anymore, even in the smaller cities. My American friend felt guilty riding them because he didn't want to sit while someone carried "his fat ass" around. (To be fair, he's not fat, other than the weight of his guilt!) Even I feel guilty, not for riding them but for bargaining. They charge so little in the first place that I feel bad talking them out of Rs. 5. Usually the distances to which the rickshaw takes you are walkable, so they seem pointless. I primarily use them if I need to go to the market at the end of a work day when I'm too tired to walk much.
   
2. They have communal cots where people gather and sit around and chat. Inside the city! This is a scene from a movie about a village or even a documentary. You usually see people squatting in a circle or sitting on a cot and gossiping or whatever. City people do the same but in coffee shops. So it was funny to watch these cots in the city.
3. The wi-fi in the hotel is unsecured and nameless! This was very funny since the hotel was so "posh", I assumed the wireless would be secure. Atleast the router would be named after the hotel right? Nope. In fact when I was trying to check the hotel for wi-fi, I assumed this router was from a neighbouring store or residence and didn't connect to it. I had half a mind to just login to the router and change the name. You know, if I was into that kind of borderline illegal stuff.
4. The only hairdressers are the ones on the streets! I haven't seen a barber shop in my area yet. All I see are lots of barbers with simple set-ups - a chair under a tree and a mirror tied to that tree. Done. If I am convinced that they change the blade in their razors, I might even try this out. They do look like they'd give great scalp massages, so that's a plus. Heck, I might get a scalp massage on a regular basis anyway.
5. The real estate agents and other service people (like lunchbox provider, maid etc) are relatively honest! Relatively is the keyword. The real estate guy that got me my place doesn't work for free, but he does seem atleast marginally interested in making sure I am comfortable, as opposed to the agents in Pune who will sell you your mother and then charge you 10%. The agents here got me furniture etc for my apartment very quickly and for modest prices without hassling me. That's all I can ask for.
   

It's nice living in a city where people have such deep roots.

An evening in Chandigarh

My American colleague R wanted to accompany me again on my trip to Chandigarh, to see the Rock Gardens, and once again he was more than welcome. I had to withdraw some money though, and since I lost my debit card, I had to do it at the bank. I linked the touristy trip with the bank because the only location of the bank is in Chandigarh (and not in Panchkula, where I live). At the bank, the teller gave me a withdrawal slip to fill out. The form had two areas marked "Signature" and "Amount" which I filled out and gave back to the teller. The teller clicks his tongue, shakes his head at me like I'm at idiot and gives me another form telling me "You need to sign here as well", pointing to the region marked "Amount". I just about lost it there! How the hell am I supposed to know that you moron! I told him politely, "Don't you think you need to tell me that beforehand?" The only justification I can think of is that it's common knowledge. But the attitude, that was uncalled for.

We took a shared auto to the rock garden. It was even better than we expected. To think just one person made all of this is incredible. I really don't know what to write about the sculptures themselves. It's an experience walking in and seeing all of them.

At the gardens, I saw a couple of ladies, a middle-aged lady and her mom, taking pictures of each other (with a film camera!). Then I heard them speak and realized they were speaking Telugu! I thought of going and talking to them but didn't want to intrude. A few mins later as the daughter was taking a picture of her mother, the mother suggested that they ask someone to take a picture of the two of them and the daughter said, "Mom, we can't keep asking everyone, they'll get mad. Let it go." At that point I felt I had to offer my help and said "Are you Telugu?" From their reaction you'd think I said "Can I kill you?" They jumped up with wide eyes and stared at me for a second. Then the daughter burst out laughing in embarrassment because she realized that I could understand everything they were saying. Even as I offered to take a picture of the two of them, she continued giggling and slunk away. The mother though was a little braver, she talked about how they were from Tirupathi and that they were visiting her son here etc. "Don't worry about taking our picture, I'm just happy that as a Telugu person, you introduced yourself." she said, as she walked away. As I explained what happened to R, he was rather amused by it all.

Then we went to the Sukhna Lake which was very pleasant. There was a group putting on a show about getting people to vote. They were wearing t-shirts that said, "If you don't vote, you loose the right to complain." That's right, they spelled it "loose" instead of "lose". I was really tempted to go to them and point it out but I didn't want to be cruel.

After that we had to deal with the wretched auto drivers again but we got a reasonable fare and headed home. (Yeah, auto driver stories coming up soon.)

Of temples and sweet old ladies in them

On Saturday I planned on taking a tour of some of the big (famous) temples in this area. A manager at work, who's visiting from the US asked if he could tag along and I told him he was more than welcome. We started off with a small nondescript temple that's right in front of our office, so we just walked there. Then we went to see the famous Mansa Devi temple, which gives my neighbourhood its name - Mansa Devi Complex or MDC. The deity here is famous for granting boons. Since the rest of our trip was going to be a bit too far to walk, we bargained an auto driver. (I'm now convinced that the Chandigarh auto drivers are lower than the scum that is the Chennai auto drivers but more on that later.)

At the temple we had to take our shoes off and I was going to suggest we leave them in the auto itself, except that the auto driver left to get some tea by the time we had that idea. But as we were walking toward the temple, a bunch of kids swarmed to us, asking us to leave our shoes with them and that it was free. Now, like any other person who believes there's no such thing as a free lunch, I assumed that since these people were practically begging us to avail of a free service, either there were going to be "hidden charges" here or that we were flat out going to get our footwear stolen here. As it turned out, it was neither. The people really do provide a free service that they're eager to perform. Now, they do sell you some prasad which you aren't obligated to buy, but it really was a free service. I was impressed.

But right after we left our footwear behind, we were walking under a 108 F sun, on stone slabs that were bent on burning through our flesh. We managed to get to the shaded part of the temple by a combination of sprints and using various shaded patches. The oddest thing about the temple was its architecture. If I didn't know it was a temple, I'd have assumed it was a mosque, from all the minars and domes. From there we walked to the Patiala temple which is right next door. More hopping, sprinting, burning feet later, we got back into the auto and headed to the Chandi temple.

This is the godess who can claim to "put the Chandi  in Chandigarh". (Also, I'm claiming copyrights to "I put the grrr in Chandigarh, baby!" ) When the city of Chandigarh was being planned, the then President of the nation visited this temple and was so impressed by it not only did he decide to name the new city after the temple,Chandigarh, he even took a stone from the temple to lay the foundation of the new city.

At the temple we met the "pujari" was in reality a sweet old lady. She told us, well me, the story of the temple. Then, as I was about to translate it for my American friend "R", she gave me a booklet and asked me to give it to him, since it contained the story of the temple in English. It was beautiful listening to her talk and even though I was translating it to R, he got the sense that she was rather devout and sincere. Later she invited us to have some water in her house and there she told us about herself. She was born just a few feet from where we were sitting, in her ancestral home where generations after generations (38 generations according to the booklet!) of her family have been taking care of the temple. She talked about her family, her estranged daughter, her granddaughter, her daughter-in-law who wouldn't stop serving us one refreshing cold drink after another. She even offered to serve us lunch but I had to take off since the auto driver was in a hurry to pick up his own kid from school.

It felt nice to have talked to someone that sweet and both us returned to the city with positive energy.

One of the coolest places in Chandigarh

The American who's visiting our office for two weeks, ostensibly to train us, is leaving this weekend. So we all went out for a farewell dinner. Our boss, who's been in Chandigarh a few times before, took us to the Taj in Chandigarh. Hidden inside there is a bar that is decorated in weird 70's psychedelic style. All the furniture was curvy and rather uncomfortable to sit it. But I bet if you got drunk or got high it would be really fun to watch all the furniture. I even remarked out loud that all that was missing was a lava lamp, and I noticed right after that, behind the bar, they had about forty lava lamps!

It was a fun evening, sharing stories about hunting, sports, cricket, movies, books. It's a good group at work, except for our manager who's such a weirdo that he'd probably have ruined the evening if he'd shown up. So I was glad when he didn't. At one point my Kolkuta colleague asked everyone what animal we'd want to be born as in our next life. I picked Eagle. Our American colleague said, "I think I'd love to come back as a woman." That cracked me up.

After that we ate at the Chinese restaurant in the hotel and that was good too. Decent food. My veggie dish was rather inexpensive but the other three were craving sea food and couldn't resist the prawns and what not. I think our bill came to about Rs. 7000. Cha ching! It was a fun night.