Friday, February 26, 2010

The last day at work

Boy, I'll be glad if I can just hold it together for a few more hours. It's been hard enough already, the packing, the planning has been overwhelming. But my team is determined to make it hard to leave. They got me bouquet of flowers. They called for a quick meeting and sat me down to share my thoughts. A little awkward to share my thoughts on demand, but I think I did a decent job. We got a group pic taken as well. My close chums in the team had bought me a jacket earlier which they got me to pick in advance.

Then all the senior staff in the office, and my team mates came out to a farewell lunch. 16 of them! I was really touched. Of course, there were awkward moments when they got me to speak about everyone and the good times in the office and so on. I'm not a big fan of these group emotional scenes so I was squirming in my seat. Particularly because there were a few there who were new to the office and a few I wasn't quite close with. But still, I appreciated them showing up. Later tonight we're going out for drinks even though I protested against it, and I'm told I'll be getting a gift there as well!

Overall it has been a sharp contrast to my last day in Pune. There I had to leave in a hurry, didn't have time to say my proper goodbyes. The journey from the office then was awkward as well involving two suitcases packed in a hurry, stuffed on a borrowed scooter, a tearful colleague and a smoke-filled bus. Today I got a royal sendoff in the office car taking me all the way to my apt to let me pack in peace. And while I am still a little behind on my packing as I type this up, I take joy in knowing that it won't be as bad the Pune experience.


Sunday, February 21, 2010

The last weekend in Chandigarh

I was very happy that my last weekend in Chandigarh ended up being very "typical". I didn't just sit at home, or even do a whole lot of packing activities. Instead I did a lot of fun activities. Saturday morning I got ready very early. So I decided to have breakfast at the temple. There is only one time that this dhaba near the temple serves that I enjoy - samosa channa/samosa chat - but this place makes it better than any other place in Chandigarh. So I had my breakfast there and for good measure decided to visit the temple too. Normally this temple gets very busy during the weekends but that day I just walked right upto the deity. I even sat in the temple under the Sun and read my book for an hour. In the afternoon I took a bus to the main city and walked up to the rose garden. Unlike the last time I visited this place, the roses were in full bloom now and so were the couples! This is one area where Chandigarh scores over Pune - there are many more parks per capita here for couples to hang out together, or even for children to play.

That evening I was invited by my lunch lady to what I was told would be a "holi with flowers" but turned out to be a bhajan. And what was worse, she wanted me there only to shoot videos. Even so I didn't mind but my camera batteries were low. So I asked her to buy me some batteries which I'd pay her back for - she said she couldn't. So screw her, I shot barely a couple of minutes before my camera died, and I took off soon after! Then I got home, freshened up and went out for dinner and a movie with my team and our boss. Dinner was good. We watched "My name is Khan" which I really enjoyed much to my surprise.

On Sunday I went to the Rajasthani mela that was going on in the city. That was fun. The food in particular was very interesting. There was a dosa-type dish called chilla. The jalebis was fantastic - thin, and slightly chewy. Like I said, I was glad I got to do all these things before leaving.

Friday, February 19, 2010

The "lame duck" phase starts

Six more days to go in this office and it shows. I have no projects on my table right now. The only thing I'm expected to do from now till I leave is train the new guy and maybe some administrative stuff. Today in particular I sat around doing nothing. It really sucks. I fully understood the meaning of the term "lame duck". You're no longer an integral cog of the machine, the machine just goes on functioning without you - hell, you're transferring the duties to the newer cogs. Well I just hope to keep my dignity intact these last few days and make it out on a positive note.

Thursday, February 18, 2010

Universal religion (Haridwar series)

You know how in big cities you run into a very heterogeneous crowd? It was like that out there in Haridwar and Hrishikesh. On one end of the spectrum we saw a bunch of foreigners (White folks) with a bunch of cameras around their necks.

(It came to my attention later that one reason we saw a lot more foreigners in Hrishikesh rather than at Haridwar was because of a certain weed that is found in abundance here. Apparently this weed grows all over the place in the mountainous regions but not so much in the valley. So these foreigners come here in search of this weed. What they do this weed I don't know. But yeah, apparently they're all fans of this weed.)

Then we saw the local as usual. We saw a Gujrati family sitting in front of us while we waited for the ropeway car. There was a Bengali family of a couple of grandparents and their teenage granddaughter. Then there was a group of loud Telugus taking pictures of a sadhu at a temple. The bus taking us back from Haridwar to Chandigarh was half-full of Kannidigas! (These guys actually got off the bus well before Chandigarh; I wonder what small village or town they all are settled in.) And we heard bits of Tamil and Malayalam as well during this trip. A very feeling to see all these people here.

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

The challenge of the "shocker" (Haridwar series)

When I told my brother I would be visiting Haridwar, he challenged me to get a picture of one of the sadhus throwing up a "shocker" sign. I was very intrigued by this challenge. So almost from the time I landed I started trying to get this picture. I knew that no one out here knew what that sign would mean, so that wasn't the concern. It was just that most of these people (to me) seemed to be genuinely religious. And I couldn't get myself to trick them into throwing up a rude sign. It would have been much easier if I saw what I felt was a "poser".

We saw a hardcore sadhu - ash-covered, almost naked - sitting near the Ganga at Haridwar. I must admit I couldn't gather the stones to go talk to him. But when I told my friend what I had in mind, he walked right up to the sadhu and asked him if we could take his picture. He said yes. Then he asked him if he wouldn't mind putting up his fingers "like this". He politely smiled and refused. Fail!

The other sadhus we saw were either rushing along somewhere or, like I said, sincerely praying. The closest I got was when we met this guy dressed up as Hanuman. He was "blessing" people for a small fee and I knew I could easily talk him into throwing up the sign. He did and I got my picture.

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

The religious convention (Haridwar Series)

You know how at a medical convention you have a lot of vendors related to the medical field trying to sell their stuff? There was a similar scene out there in Haridwar with babas selling themselves instead. One was offering yoga classes, another meditation. But the best ones of all were offering to solve global warming and cure AIDS (not kidding). It was just pathetic. But hey, you gotta sell yourself to your target demographic. (Someone's dying to add "Marketers 3, Customers 0" in the comments).

And of course, keeping with the disgusting theme of "soliciting" visitors to their meta-temples that we saw in Jammu, here too there were a bunch of "priests" shouting at us, asking us to pay their temple a visit. And while you are in their corner, you were asked to donate something, preferably a C-note based on the not-so-subtle hints they were giving. You see, in S. India that stuff won't fly. People are a lot smarter or atleast a lot more cynical. Thank you N. India for turning me off of temples for the foreseeable future.

Visiting Haridwar and Hrishikesh (Haridwar series)

This weekend I visited Haridwar, possibly my last trip during my Chandigarh stay. It was a fun little trip. The cities are pretty close to Chandigarh, 5 hours in fact. (That is too far to be able to go there on a day trip, and too close to have good quality buses, like sleepers, plying from Chandigarh.) Very little planning went into it. My motivation was primarily to just spend some time under the sun and on the banks of the Ganga so I would have been satisfied just going there, reading a book and coming back. I was however counting on good weather, which was granted to me. Just perfect conditions to explore a couple of cities.

Both these cities are on the banks of the river Ganga. We visited Hrishikesh first, which is upriver, probably the cleanest we ever got to see Ganga. Lakshman Jhoola, the "Apartment Complex of the Gods", Ram Jhoola and got to spend some time just sitting on the banks of Ganga. I took my only dip in the river over here, somehow taking a bath in front of a ton of people in Haridwar didn't appeal to me. Haridwar was a lot more hectic and a lot more "commercial" than Hrishikesh. We did visit a couple of temples that were up on hills. This time we didn't try to play cute (like for Vaishno Devi in Jammu) by climbing them, we just took the ropeway.

It was interesting visiting a place that I last visited about 20 years ago and trying to remember stuff. Like that picture on the Lakshman Jhoola. The dip in Ganga at Haridwar and visiting the temple up on the hill. Faint memories from ages ago. Still, it was very relaxing to visit those places and see those sights. For a last trip, it wasn't too shabby.



Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Threatening the bank

A new grocery store opened up in my neighborhood and since I was dissatisfied with the existing store, I started frequenting this new store. Today morning I walked in to pick up a soda on my way to work and noticed that the shopkeeper was on the phone so I decided to wait for him. As I waited I couldn't help hearing what he was saying. I had obviously caught him in the middle of his complaint to a customer service representative (in Hindi)-

"... saw the number on my caller ID and decided to call back...some Rohit Malhotra (not the real name)...Of course, that's why I called this number. How dare this guy? He dares question me about a Rs. 253 payment? What does he think of himself? A guy making 1.5 lakhs a year dare call up a guy making Rs. 50 lakhs a year and speak rudely? I have raised a Rs. 60 lakh loan in one day. No offense madam but do you have the ability to raise that amount? Doesn't that then tell you that I'm an important man?... I am on my way to the main branch to give a written complaint. I want this rascal to get the proper punishment. Are you talking from Pune? Well I don't care, I am from Mumbai, I know a few people. It'll hardly take me 10 minutes to trace this guy and then if I find him, he won't be able to walk for the rest of his life. Hell, all I need to do is withdraw my Rs. 6 crore fixed deposit and blame this guy for it. That'll show him. Manager get fired for losing Rs. 10 lakh accounts, this guy will get crushed if I take any action. Well I know this guy is around that's why I called you, tell this bastard to take care of himself because I'm coming for him."

After he hung up the phone (I had been standing there for 20 minutes atleast) he turns to me and tells me his side of the story. Apparently the guy called to make a reminder for a Rs.253 installment on a Rs. 60 lakh loan. And when he couldn't find the original recipient of the loan he insisted on talking to his wife and then his father-in-law who is sick with cancer. After cursing the caller out for a while, he went on tell me another story -

"I sent one of my servant to collect a certificate from the bank and this one guy at the bank asked the servant to pay a Rs. 3500 bribe. My servant came back and told me about it. So I got in my car and drove to the main branch, sat in front of the manager and silently wrote out a check for my entire (a few crores) deposit and asked him to transfer it to their competitor. The manager was shaken up and asked me what had happened. I told him and he summoned the guy from the other branch. The manager then told this clerk, "I am going to lose my job over losing this man's account. I will in turn make sure that you never work in any other bank in your life." The clerk started crying and fell at my feet and tried to offer me a reverse bribe to accept my certificate. I told him that I didn't want my certificate here, I want him to deliver it to my farm (a few 100 kms away), at 6am. The guy showed up with that certificate at 6am. So yeah, I am not a man to be trifled with." 

The funniest part of this whole incident is that the bank he was got the rude phone call from in the morning was the same bank that called me and asked me to deposit more money!!! I am really thinking of taking my money out and storing it in a sock or something.

Monday, February 8, 2010

A great wife

Everyone should be so lucky as me.

On a day that is already quite forgettable, I have to thank my wife for doing her part to try and make it better. The SuperBowl was going on and I woke up at 5am to watch it. And by watch of course I mean that I just follow the game on ESPN's gamecast. It's quite good. With that and the commentary from a few sports blogs I usually have a good idea of what's going on on the field. But my wife couldn't "take anymore of (me) sitting in front of a computer hitting refresh". So she set up her webcam and pointed it at the TV. And she HATES setting up the webcam :)

Of course, the bandwidth limitations at my end prevented me from enjoying the game too much but I did get to catch a few glimpses of the game. Later I had to ask her to turn it off and just put the audio on. So I got to enjoy the play-by-play as it was happening, the closest to watching a live NFL game as I ever got this season. We shall not speak of the game itself or the aftermath. Like I said, this day is quite forgettable. But yeah, I will always remember the early part of the day.

Sunday, February 7, 2010

More lessons corporations should take from the juice vendors

Dear McDonald's workers in India. Look, we're all Indians here, right? Let's not pretend that we like our soft drinks the way the American do - container full of ice with the soda taking up the gaps in between. You wouldn't like it if I served your overpriced soda like that. Why would you think I would want mine like that? Particularly after I specifically told you I didn't want ice in my drink? Dude, I don't care what your bosses told you. Help a brother out, willya? Next time I ask for a soda with no ice, I want a cup, FULL of soda, and NO ice.

Meanwhile at yet another juice shop today another "little guy" looked at my glass which was 90% full and popped in another full orange to squeeze out enough juice to fill my glass to the brim.

Shame on your McDonalds, and shame on you Subway.

Saturday, February 6, 2010

Bonding over Dhokla

I happened to find myself in the Chandigarh market area (as opposed to Panchkula where I normally work, live etc) one Tuesday evening. I finished my work quite early and I didn't want to go home yet. So I walked into a sweet shop to pick up a snack. I decided on Dhokla, one plate. The guy behind the counter weighed out 250 gms of the stuff and as he was closing the box I stopped him and said (in Hindi) - "Add some more (chili) peppers to the box." The guy broke into a huge smile. "The joy of eating Dhokla is mainly the peppers. We get all sorts of crazy people here who ask us to remove the peppers and it drives me crazy." And so he went on while he wrapped up my dhokla box. I think I made his day :)

Wednesday, February 3, 2010

DO NOT. DOUBT. MY. MATH.

As arrogant as I come off as, I am terrified of making mistakes. Because I HATE IT when I'm wrong. Having said that, there's nothing I hate more than when someone suspects the accuracy of my work without giving me the benefit of doubt.

I had a face-off with my current manager a few months ago, when I did make a mistake. The mistake was mostly my fault, and while there were redeeming circumstances, I take the blame. The mistake itself wasn't big, it was just compounded by the fact that it happened during this particular analysis, because it took so long to run the analysis each time we made a change. But from that day on, I felt like he's been constantly suspicious of the quality of my work. He's always checking my work and asking me insultingly detailed questions about if I'd checked my own work. I put up with it because, well, I'd earned it. But I think I'd more than redeemed myself with the quality of my work before and after that incident. But it doesn't seem to be enough for him.

Today the younger engineer was working on a project that I'd worked on about four months ago. (The customer wanted some modifications done to the structure and we were trying to see how much these mods would help.) Over the course of today's work, they came upon a certain calculation I'd performed to calculate a force. The original report done by another company had made a bunch of assumptions and (in my opinion) oversimplified the problem. My own calculations were more detailed and thorough. My manager didn't understand the calculations, not because he couldn't, but because he didn't want to work through the calculus. He called me over to explain my work and I walked him through it. He still didn't understand it but sent me back to my desk. He then called our boss over and in hushed tones tried to tell him that my calculations were suspect/wrong. I was fuming as I overheard their conversation (they were sitting one station away from me) but I didn't get up to defend myself. After listening to everything, our boss, who has a little more faith in me, called me over to explain again. So I did. (Honestly this was a 11th-grade calculus problem.) He took his time and gave my work his nod. As a check, he suggested we run a simplified model that would check my calculus. It worked, I was right.

Man, I wanted to let out a huge whoop of success at that moment and scream obscenities at my manager but obviously I couldn't. So, let me do it on my own blog - F*** YOU!!!!!

Tuesday, February 2, 2010

HR faux pas

After the fiasco with the previous HR advisor who had to be fired, the company hired a new HR advisor. To train this new HR advisor a couple of HR managers showed up and our existing HR brought the whole gang (all women by the way) around for introductions. The HR managers, who are based in Dubai (an American) and Singapore (a Singaporean) respectively, spent more than a few minutes chatting with us. The S'pore HR started of by saying, "Let us know whatever you need, we're here to help you in any way." Then out of nowhere, "In fact, we can even help you find girlfriends if you need." (What??) It didn't stop there - "In fact, our new HR advisor here is single, just letting you know." That poor girl (the new HR advisor) turned 10 shades of crimson at that.

Since there was this banter going on, one of the engineers said, "You know, we've been asking (the present HR) to hire more females engineers." which brought a lot of laughter. To that the HR responded, "Well, I'm trying. It's just that the qualifications for the post are so high that no girls are qualified for this position." Now I agree with that as a matter of fact - the number of highly qualified female engineers, particularly in India, is very small. But come on, as an HR, and in particular as a woman, you can't make statements like that! That's for sexist guys like me to make! Wow! The White chick was just squirming at this point thinking about all the lawsuits that would have been brought against the company if this conversation had been taking place in the US.

The plastic bag ban

A lot of cities in the country are trying to impose a ban on plastic bags. I must say that I don't fully understand how bad plastic bags are for the environment (as opposed to paper bags) or how much their net cost is compared to their net utility, but for now I'll play along because at the very least, since we don't have a proper garbage disposal system in the country, I don't want to see these plastic rags just strewn all over the place.

The AOC centre in Hyderabad has prominent signs that advertise this ban on plastic bags. In Chandigarh, in the time that I've been here, I've seen a marked decline in the usage of plastic bags. More and more shopkeepers refuse to give you plastic bags citing pressure from various sources (presumably the police). Of course the pressure doesn't seem to be a constant thing because these very same vendors have reverted to using plastic bags when I checked a few weeks later. The customers for their part seem to be showing up with reusable bags to get groceries etc. Let me also qualify this observation by noting that my sample space is very small, I've seen this happen only a handful of times. But it is more than I've ever seen before and that's something I suppose.

From my side I have no qualms about using plastic bags. My entire "trash" situation is dependent on me using plastic bags to store my trash, which is thrown away by the maid when it gets filled up. But I justify it to myself by thinking about how many fewer plastic bags I am using because I don't buy groceries as regularly as the others here.